Nearly two more weeks into the new house and it's really starting to feel like home now - read that as Andy has taken over the kitchen work surfaces with bike bits and Steph has taken over the lounge, in much the same way they did when we were back in the UK :)
We've had a funny couple of weeks as we both fully expected baby to come at the end of August, we didn't for one minute think that baby would still be a bump well into September. Consequently we made very few plans and have kind of just been enjoying going from one day to the next and actually taking time to relax.
Following my last blog entry we've slowed down our rate of productiveness completely! We've had a good sort through the garage now and managed to open nearly all the boxes. It's amazing how differently things are viewed after 8 weeks without them. There's some things I am really appreciating having back. For example Steph's red box. Having spent 8 weeks with her standing on an IKEA stool / step every time she wanted to be up high to cook or do some crafting I am more than happy to wave goodbye to the stool / step. She wriggles and jiggles so much I lost count of the number of times she fell off the stool. I love the red box :)
Other things we've really appreciated are things like my kitchen bits, I always find cooking in someone else's kitchen really difficult and have loved having all my bits back and being able to find the exact thing I need rather than having to search through cupboards for something that will do. And my bed, I love having my bed back :)
There's been other items we've looked at and kind of thought 'hang on, why do we have that? Why did I even buy it?' Part of this is separation from the item and a realisation that it really wan't needed. But I think, to some extent, it's also to do with the lifestyle out here. We've had 8 weeks to experience the lifestyle and realised that actually said item just doesn't work with the lifestyle we seem to have developed out here. (As I sit here my brain has gone blank and I can't think of any examples for you!!)
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| The UK cables we have found so far............ |
Lastly there's various things we're unpacking and looking at knowing they're never going to be used as we pretty much can't use them; UK extension cables, (how many do we have?!!), radiator drying racks (there are no radiators here!!)
Suffice to say our unpacking has caused us great amusement :)
Unlike July 4th we pretty much ignored Labour Day, we didn't plan to but we fully expected to be in hospital or getting to grips with things at home and therefore didn't make any plans. I believe it is actually celebrated very well here, more so than July 4th, I shall have to share that experience next year. We played in the garage for the day, well Andy and Steph did while I made the most of being 40+ weeks and sat in my directors chair.
The rest of the week has been pretty quiet. Steph and I have had a bit of a routine of going out in the mornings and then spending our afternoons at home playing and reading books. Which has been really nice for both of us. I've found this week slightly easier than last week as I am actually relaxing and we've just thoroughly enjoyed each others company.
Being at home having a quiet week has also given me chance to reflect a little on the various groups I / we have joined over the last few weeks and the people we've met and where we go from here.............
Initially I followed the generic route of meeting people through meeting others and word of mouth and things seemed to get off to a good start. But meeting people with young children is very different here to the UK. In the UK there was always a local group that you could go to with your child. These groups are based in village halls or churches and run by organisations for all Mums / Dads and young children so even if you didn't know anyone you could find out about the groups and go along. Inevitably you would meet people but you were also introducing your child to an 'organised setting' where they sat together to sing songs, did an organised activity and learnt how to be civilised!
It's very different over here. There are, as far as I can work out, (if anyone reading this knows different please let me know!!) very few organised groups, apart from story time at the various libraries or paid for activity classes. There are groups out there, in as much as a group of Mum's will get together at the local park for a morning but you need to be in the know to know that these things are happening. So far I have joined 2 groups through the internet, one is a Meetup group called Boulder Area Moms. This group seems to count the library story times as the official meet-ups with very little else happening, despite having 400+ members. The only other thing that has happened through this group is a park meetup once a week at various parks, where I have met and am getting to know some really lovely people. I will be fascinated to know what happens to these general meetups when it is too cold to use the park though.........
The other group I have joined is something called Mod Moms, a group that I would never have found with out being told about. Initially this looks great. Within this group there are many subgroups, mainly one for each year and you join the sub group of the year your child was born. Then, within the sub group the Mum's take it in turns to 'host' an event on a weekly basis. Again another great group of people that I am slowly getting to know.
But that is as far as I have got. I'm hoping that through these groups I will gradually meet more and more people and start to make some good friends and continue to build the friendships I have already started. But, my head keeps saying BUT. As far as I can see this seems to be how it all works out here and everyone seems quite happy with it. It does mean you can lead quite an independent life, as groups don't always happen on a weekly basis and can change days from week to week depending on the host and you can pick and choose when you go. To some extent when you do go you invite yourself as it's a generic invitation for all groups members. I know it's a generic invitation in the UK but it's at a hall or something, here it could be at someone's house, which feels different. It's a whole different way of thinking and doing things that I hadn't anticipated, that will take a while to get used to. It's not a bad thing and I hope the above doesn't convey that, I'm just trying explain the differences as best I can.
My main BUT is for Steph as most of these groups just basically involve meeting people and playing, where at 2 she can be oblivious to the other children and play entirely on her own (is that being 2 or just inherited from Daddy!). I think I also hadn't anticipated that with a two year old you can take them to the park to play and at the end of the session they still won't know anyone as they have played on their own. They physically need to be put in close proximity to another and introduced several times. What I miss most is the structure of the groups at home where we sat together to sing songs, some groups did a craft time and the children were starting to learn routines, structures, the togetherness of all sitting down to sing and generally started to recognise that they were part of a group and not an individual. Possibly the teacher in me is finding this hard but I also feel as a Mum I want Steph to develop those skills and she's not. And frankly there's only so much nursery rhyme singing we can do together at home!!!
To some extent it's a strange situation I find myself in. I really hadn't expected Mum and toddler groups to be so different / hard to find. As with a lot of things that can happen within a culture everyone knows how it works and makes it work for them but can't really explain it clearly to as newcomer. The only thing I can do is live it and enjoy it and keep working through it until I understand the system. I suspect this may take a while and will be a very interesting experience. I can, at this moment in time, see myself writing about this again next year but from a very different viewpoint and understanding where the light suddenly dawns and what has been staring me in the face becomes much clearer!!
But (another but) I do just want to add that despite having to try to understand a new system and culture Steph and I have been kept very busy meeting the people we have and have had a great time exploring all the local parks. We have met some wonderful people and are really starting to make what I would call real friends, which is a fantastic feeling. I even added my first American friends to Facebook last week :)
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| Suitcases make fun beds!! |
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| My treehouse! |
Baby Update!
We're now sitting at 10 days late. Either we have a stubborn baby that doesn't want to come out or just a lazy baby that's quite happy where he / she is. I think Steph has lost interest as I keep saying the baby is going to come any day and it still hasn't appeared but she is being incredibly caring does have moments of referring to the baby - today she told me the baby was going climbing with her and Daddy tomorrow! On a medical front all seems to be fine, the hospital have been monitoring the baby's heartbeat, they've scanned me and we now have an induction booked for next Thursday. When we knew our baby was due at the end of August I didn't for one minute think we would ever get as far as September 12th, which seems to be looking more and more likely................
